When crossing guard-turned-off-the-books vigilante Frank Peniston discovers his neighbor's electric lawn mower has been stolen, he doesn't just mow for justice-he mows for answers.
With a holster full of infinite bullets, a 2005 Chevy Malibu named Madge, and a bloodstream dangerously overloaded with Full Throttle energy drinks, Frank uncovers a deep-rooted conspiracy involving rogue landscapers, mower trafficking, and a plot to overthrow small-town governance-one blade at a time.
Explosions. Monologues. Wildly inappropriate sex. It's all here in this autobiographical thriller Frank insists is "99% true, except for the parts the government redacted.
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